The word, "Neurodiversity" isn't in our everyday vocabulary, is it? I don't hear it so often but once I knew what it meant, it probably became one of my favorite words recently. Neurodiversity is the viewpoint or perception that our ways of thinking are normal, not strange, unusual or a subject of irregularity. We all think differently about things, people and different topics in life. Yet, we hear each other saying what they think and we think that they're wrong or they're doing something wrong or we think our opinions are better than others. We think we know better than others. We think we know what others need or want. In life, we think there's always a right or wrong answer.
When it comes to having a disability, it's so easy for people to think they know what people with disabilities want or need so they decide for us what it is. They think they know what we're capable of and not capable of. They think they know what we're thinking and what we're feeling. They believe they got it all figured out! People see us sitting down in wheelchairs, using sign language, using a cane while walking or having difficulties with picking up a spoon while eating. Suddenly, we're invalids. Then people see a person in a wheelchair going up a hill or putting their wheelchair in the backseat of the car and say, "Whoops! Somebody in a wheelchair needs help. Gotta go!" then run over and start helping them but without permission from the person who is in the wheelchair. That person "helping" thinks the person with the wheelchair is so incompetent that they don't have the ability to do things on their own, not even ask for help. So they think they need to go over there and start helping.
People with disabilities do not need help with everything and may not need as much help as we think. When someone sees a person with a disability, people think it's their jobs to help or do things for them, speak up for them or tell them something that's very obvious (you just finished frying eggs and then say, "be careful around the stove, it's still hot." Well, duh! Like we don't know stoves are hot for a while after being used recently like we all learned in Kindergarten!).
I have multiple disabilities and I experience this a lot. I get told the obvious things a lot as if I'm blind (I'm not) or incompetent (not that, either!). Because of stereotypes and because some people don't have disabilities, some of those who live without disabilities do not understand that those who live with a disability think as themselves as people and don't let their disabilities define them. I never let mine define me. I go on living my life, enjoying it without worrying so much about what I can't do. I focus on what I CAN do! Unfortunately, I've been confronted by people who only focus on what I can't do and that I can't think, rather than what I can do and that I have the ability to think and process information.
This happens because of stereotypes or comments about people with disabilities and people believe them. Read up on the other part of this blog debunking 10 stereotypes and misconceptions about individuals with various disabilities.
Challenging Stereotypes and Embracing Neurodiversity
Instead of embracing stereotypes, embrace neurodiversity. People with and without disabilities aren't always going to do what you expected and that's ok! Because of the stereotypes about people with disabilities, some people assume they know how their minds work and they believe they know what people with disabilities need or want and they think they know better.
So they go ahead and push a person in a wheelchair up the ramp because they believe people in wheelchairs are weak and don't know how to ask for help or didn't think to, they shout at deaf people because they believe deaf people will hear them and not be annoyed by the yelling and they point out the most obvious thing or direct them to do things to people with learning disabilities because they believe people with learning or intellectual disabilities are stupid, slow or confused.
While it may be true that people with learning or intellectual disabilities process information differently, it doesn't mean they're incompetent because they're doing something unexpected or they weren't doing what was expected. For example, when I'm out in public with people and I happen to be looking at something interesting while everyone else is ready to move on, I get singled out and told "come on, let's go" when there is someone else in the group who have done the same thing but didn't get told to get a move on. It's like they think I'm not paying attention to the rest of the group or my surroundings or I'm not allowed to take an extra minute to appreciate something that interests me or just take my time.
Thanks to the stereotypes, people think if someone like me make mistakes, do something risky or do or say something unexpected, it's automatically because of our disability. So someone will feel the need to correct or "fix" them or even help them without permission. We're not broken! People with disabilities, whether they're deaf, blind, in wheelchairs or mentally challenged, are not broken people that require correction or being fixed. Being a person with a disability just means they're different and they do things differently and that's not a bad thing. People could learn something new from people like me like empathy, patient, keeping an open mind and letting go of control over how people act or think.
Celebrating Neurodiversity!
Neurodiversity is all about people thinking differently from each other without being accused of having a defect or disorder. It's about letting go of control over how people act or behave and just worrying about how you react to those who think or act differently from you. It's also about letting go of societal norms. The world is changing all the time and many people have difficulties adjusting to the change, trying to hold onto the societal norms, even stereotypes because so many people don't know how to respond to something that's so different to them.
While neurodiversity focuses primarily on neurological differences and addresses those with autism and ADHD and mental conditions, for example, neurodiversity can be applied to other aspects of diversity like minority groups and certain communities such as people with non-cognitive disabilities, black people, the LGBTQ community and socioeconomic individuals.
Because we all come from different backgrounds, cultures and have various beliefs and values and even different brains and bodies, we all think differently and that's ok! It's ok to not have the same beliefs, opinions or values. That's the beauty of cultivating compassion and empathy! We don't have to agree on the same things and we can just drop our egos and agree to disagree in order to be more civil and compassionate with others. We can even learn from each other and ask how we make our own choices instead of making assumptions. By making assumptions, you're closing the doors to learning something new, forming new beliefs and relationships that may be beneficial for you.
By learning about others and their actions, we become more empathic, patient, non-judgmental and loving to others. Eventually, we'll live happier lives without barriers. No more of others telling us what to do, what to say, how to do something, we become more educated when we communicate with each other and learn why we do what we do, have more access to other communities, workplaces, education and healthcare and we have less misunderstanding, misjudgments, inequality, tension and social conflicts with our loved ones, peers, colleagues and everyone else in all our communities.
Note: This is an important blog and I thank everyone for reading. Please let me know what you think in the comment section and if you liked this blog or it resonates with you, please feel free to share and comment!
